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Dream - Everyone surely has a past in terms of romance, including experiences in relationships with exes before getting married. However, often those relationships have to come to an end. When someone has married a different partner, there are times when memories of an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend resurface in the mind. In fact, in some cases, the urge to rekindle a relationship with an ex is very likely to arise.
However, in the midst of that desire, there is a life partner who already exists beside us in marriage. Even though we have a faithful wife or husband beside us, memories of former lovers sometimes hold such strong power that it is difficult to fully give our heart to our current partner.
According to Islamic perspective, this issue can be complex and closely related to the principles of justice, loyalty, and responsibility in marriage. Islam teaches the importance of maintaining the integrity of the marital bond and avoiding behaviors that can harm the husband-wife relationship.
Islamic teachings also emphasize the importance of honest communication and mutual understanding between partners in facing issues like this. It also emphasizes the importance of living a family life with full responsibility and obedience to religious values. Matters of the heart are indeed God's affairs. However, as humans, we are given the ability to control the desires of the heart.
There is a possibility that humans perceive the emotional turmoil they feel in their hearts as a sign that the person they are thinking of is their soulmate. However, it is important to remember that this urge may come from the devil, who is trying to tempt humans into falling into unhealthy thoughts and feelings.
Therefore, humans must strive hard to not be dissolved in such urges and control their hearts and minds with full awareness.
If someone has tried hard to control their heart and stay away from unhealthy thoughts, then they can hope for Allah's forgiveness. However, if someone from the beginning has let themselves be carried away by emotions and is unable to control their thoughts and feelings, that can be considered a sin. Therefore, it is important for every Muslim to always strive to guard their heart and mind to remain obedient to religious teachings.
Memory about the past, especially about former lovers, often arises suddenly in someone's mind. Even though someone is already married, does the emergence of memories about former lovers not become a problem in Islam?
As humans, we do not have full control over our memories, but we can respond to them appropriately. This should not be a problem if memories of an ex suddenly come to mind. The most important thing is that we should respond to these memories wisely.
"(HR. Abu Daud)" in English is "(Narrated by Abu Daud)".
When memories of an ex suddenly arise, we can respond wisely. In this context, being wise means not letting ourselves fall into imagination, searching for valuable things from the ex, sending messages, calling, or taking any other actions that can damage the relationship we have built with our partner. It is important not to let those memories dominate our thoughts and jeopardize the integrity of the marriage.
That is the Islamic view on remembering the past while being in a marriage. Therefore, it is best for us to be responsible for the marriage relationship that has been built with our partner. Do not let it be ruined just because of remembering the past that has passed.
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