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Dream - Many do not realize that family upbringing significantly shapes a person's personality. One of the phenomena that is currently being discussed is the 'mokondo' men.
The term 'mokondo' refers to the attitude of an adult man who should be able to take responsibility for himself, his wife, and his children, but is unable to do so. Already married but does not provide for the family, does not contribute to parenting, only wants to be 'served' in the household.
The condition, according to Meilinda Sutanto, a family constellation therapist, indicates that a man's emotional maturity level is very low. It's like having a toddler in an adult's body, or what is called a manchild.
"A manchild has a low level of emotional maturity, refuses responsibility, has low motivation, struggles to commit, wants everything to be easy, has difficulty making decisions, struggles to face the reality of life, and expects others, especially parents, to solve all their problems," Meilinda expressed.
According to Meilinda, the mokondo man or manchild is also known as PeterPan syndrome or a man who refuses to grow up. This can happen due to incorrect parenting patterns.
Every parent indeed has different concepts and ways of raising and caring for their children. One fundamental and very important aspect of parenting concept is not always to set them free or protect them, but to train the child to grow into an independent individual. They can live on their own even if their parents are no longer around.
If this is not provided by parents, the effect is certainly significant. Especially in terms of a man's maturity. For example, when parents implement permissive parenting patterns.
"When a man is raised as a child with permissive parenting patterns, which excessively spoils and indulges him, the child expects that life in adulthood will also be easy and everything will be taken care of. The same goes for receiving overprotective parenting patterns, which protect him from anything considered dangerous and solve all his problems, resulting in a lack of problem-solving skills and living in a bubble far from reality," Meilinda explained.
The mental condition of "manchild", according to Meilinda, can also occur when one is too attached to their mother and becomes a "mama's boy". This makes them overly dependent, and as adults, they project the needs they didn't get from their mother onto their partner, "You cannot love a manchild and expect him to grow up, only his mother can," Meilinda said.
Just look at Denny's appearance following his daughter's hair style, Cundamani. It's really funny!
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